Dear Stupid People who swim in a mire of ignorance, racism, paranoia, and religious fervor,

Get off of the Interwebz. Or, stay on the Interwebz, but quit posting content to the Interwebz.

I’m probably just cranky because I found out I’m a man today. I don’t want to be a man. I like men, but I don’t want to be one.

Though my breasts nearly melted off my body from yesterday’s hot yoga class, I do have breasts. I have birthed three children, and though it’s no concern of yours what I do with my vagina, I assure you I have one. (Spoiler alert: the following video does not contain my vagina.)

Unfortunately, however, I am a man because (and the computer graphic in the embedded video says so) my index finger is shorter than my ring finger.

I am not alone though. I share this fate with “Mechelle Obama,” according to the fount of ever-living truth which is the YouTube source for this revelation.

If you want to know more about “God,creation, and where you need to be,” you can track that down through the YouTube link.